I am a filthy whore.
Oh yeah, I totally went there. I have no shame about it, not anymore. If a publisher pays for it, baby, I’ll write it and fake that I am happy for as long as they know me (and the check clears). They don’t even have to pretend that they respect me as long as the money clears. $5,000 to write some silly smut novel under an assumed name? Why not? It all pays the same.
A lot of people really question my attitude about it. I don’t blame them, considering how hard I often come down on publishers for being dickweevils (totally a word in the south, promise) to their authors. But — and this is a Jennifer Lopez-sized but here — if the publisher is holding up their end of the contract and paying the author royalties and advances on time, then I’m an extremely forgiving guy when they don’t exactly push the new author as hard as their established mid-lister.
(looks around to see who is going to nuke this on Saturday and publicly wonder if I have truly lost my goram mind)
Look, the reason a lot of people write is because it can pay. Sure, I hold a lot of people in high regard who write purely for the art. Me? MONEY.
…and no psychiatrist bills…
Okay, I do have some standards. Like if a publisher wanted me to write gay alien cowboy romance (Star-Lords in Heat. Eh? Ehhh?) I wouldn’t write it for free.Okay, with a title like that, I’d probably write it for $50. That’s just too hilarious to pass up.
“Why,” you ask as you shake your head and wonder if you’ve fallen down the rabbit hole, “am I reading about this when I should be reading about writing and editing tips?”
Beats the hell out of me. I did warn you at the top (the title says it all).
By the way, Jason is an author who just collaborated on a novel that came out this past week, which was fortuitous timing. He didn’t plan it that way, but if you liked the movie Deadpool, MGC’s resident Spaniard suggests that you might also like his new novel, Kraken Mare, out now.
He would also like to apologize to the random gay alien cowboys who may have been offended at the idea of him writing a love story for them. They deserve better.