I spent today, with other Islander friends, Aboriginal and otherwise, taking my part a traditional hunting practice that goes back oh, maybe 30 000 years. “Birdin’“ – collecting the large chicks of Short-tailed Shearwaters (which, for the record, makes more ecological sense than shooting or trapping adult birds, and is certainly less cruel than commercial chicken farming). It involves sticking your hand – really fast, down a burrow, and catching the bird before its sharp beak slices you or claws scratch your hands.

You can’t wear gloves, because the holes are also the favorite homes of Australian tiger snakes and copperheads (also partial to muttonbirds). The only way you can tell what you’re going to find in the hole is the temperature. Oh, and as the hole is much deeper than your arm is long you have put your hand in (and reach the decision on what you might find in there) really, really fast. There are islands without the snakes. This wasn’t one of them.

So I spent my day lying in dirt and birdshit, sticking my hands into holes that could harbor something that will cause me intense pain, and could very easily kill me. It’s our food, and it’s what islanders do. No one cares if you don’t. But you’ll never really be one of them if you don’t. Oh yeah, for my feminist readers, it’s a terribly sexist thing. I’ve yet to see a female birder. Not that there’s anything or anyone stopping them, and they usually come along and help with cleaning. It’s filthy, dangerous, hard work. A thing the poor and aboriginal (sometimes the same thing) did. For us it still is a fairly important part of our food. Generally, these days, it’s not life and death, but it used to be, and is still respected and, yes, loved for that. Fresh it was food, salted down food in winter, the oil, and fat and down all used. Besides if you’re an islander, nothing, but nothing, ever tastes quite like muttonbird. Well, the best approximation is chicken (if you’re hungry enough) crossed with a strong flavored sardine. One of the guys in RSL (Returned Serviceman’s League, of which I am a proud member) used to get muttonbirds sent to him in Vietnam in biscuit tins of salt. Some of my birds are going as gifts to a couple of old folk, who are just too old to do it anymore, and don’t have younger family to provide. They’ll probably get a fair number from various people, because that’s how we work here.

I’m telling this story for a few reasons. Among them was the surprise of finding I have been nominated for a Hugo the Best Fan Writer for my writing here on MAD GENIUS CLUB. You may remember Cedar Sanderson and Amanda Green were also on the “Sad Puppies” and “Rabid Puppies” suggested slate of possible noms. You probably also remember that I said I was flattered and amused (if not you can look it up) but I’m an old pro, and I thought it was an award to encourage fans. Turns out I was wrong and there is a long history of the award going to established authors, even last year going to fairly dodgy revisionist history. Yes, women have always gone birdin’ too.

Anyway, I thought I was out of it, and encouraged folk to vote Cedar and Amanda. On account, I gather, of them being Mormon men, and white and Hetero… This has come as a severe shock to Sanford Begley who has discovered he must be gay. And Mormon. (for those of you struggling to follow this puzzling piece, furious ‘real fans’ (we’re fake fans, on account, it seems of failing the ideological purity test. Ask Mike Glyer for your personal inquisition) have informed us that Sad Puppies is entirely a White, Male, Mormon hetero plot. And as Sanford is engaged to be married to one of those ‘Mormon males’ it’s a shame he isn’t on the noms too. We could satisfy all their diversity concerns then. After all we already have the managed to get the most native Americans on the nomination list, evah. Actually, there is a sort of Mormon missionary aspect to it all, but that is merely because degree of politeness in the face of abuse that Brad Torgersen manages.

So I was actually very sad (just like puppies) when Theresa Nielsen-Hayden and her sycophants over on “Making Light” – you know, the hangout of “Requires Hate” and other nice people. (“making light”? by squalling for the government to pay for an electrician to change the bulb, I’d guess. They seem to spend a lot of time in dark, shrieking.) started issuing threats and abuse to SP3 and RP nominees before the final nomination list was released. Among the kind thing said by these sweet people was that we SP supporters were rich white boys. Boys, we are informed, not men.

hands

This is what the hands of your typical rich white boy looks like after a hard day at the cocktail bar, oppressing women and minorities. (you can click on the picture to actually see it larger) Also notice the lounge lizard suit and designer stubble. Just thought you’d like to know. I wonder what working men’s hands would look like? Actually, the odd thing about the SP crowd is just how many of them DON’T (as the dahlings of Making Light seem to) come from white-bread academia. Portuguese dairy farmers, ex-army NCO’s, Alaskan homesteaders, even blokes like me who grew up around commercial fishing boats. It isn’t necessary for writing, of course, but it does mean they’re writing from experience of the real thing. If your experience of the world is white-bread suburbia, and an East Coast Liberal College, where you now teach creative writing, maybe you’re not understanding the vast bulk of potential readers too well.

We were warned that the wrath of the important people in SF. When this comes from a major (ex) editor, wife of a major powerful editor at Tor, who has the support of all of the Traditional Publishing establishment it’s a real, credible ‘you’ll never work in this town again’ threat. It is plain and simple intimidation. Open, cut-and-dried bullying. Power being abused… as it has been for a long, long time.

Brad Torgersen came in for the lion’s share of disgusting abuse from a petulant ‘making light’ – How dare he put people on his slate without getting their permission first? (Brad hadn’t – by accident, asked a couple of people)

Just think about this slowly for a minute.

WHY should it be necessary to tell someone that you’re going to recommend their work be considered as a nomination? What? You want me to ask the author if I can recommend his book or story? Have you lost your mind? It happens thousands of times. Examples abound. No-one ever asked permission. You shouldn’t be able to force them to put it up… or take it down. THEY DON’T NEED YOUR PERMISSION. GOT IT? Except… somehow Brad and Sad Puppies were an exception. Let’s face it: there is only one possible reason for this ‘outrage’. Our dear little friends at ‘Making Light’ were planning to sabotage and attack the authors on that list – planning in other words to abuse power. People should know they’re in danger of ‘being tainted’, being attacked, being shunned…

Being bullied.

Having their careers destroyed.

Nice people, ‘Making Light’.

I was quite pissed off I’d told SP3 and RP that I didn’t want to be on the slate.
EDITED FOR CLARITY: I put the fact that I felt there were better more deserving people to target (such as my co-writers Amanda and Cedar) up ON MAD GENIUS CLUB. I did not contact either SP or RP organizers. They in no way ignored my request. I was in no way at all shamed or upset by being on the list. Got it, jackasses? No you can’t use it to bully Brad Torgersen. I can’t force you to quote me, any more than I could force Brad to read that on MGC or act on it, but I sure as hell will rub your noses in this if you try.

I don’t take to bullying well. I’m usually pretty easy going, but a behemoth picking on little guys infuriates and disgusts me (which is what this is. Tor is still the biggest, most powerful traditional sf publishing house at present. They wield a great deal of power and influence. They can (and have in the past) destroy and make careers.) It rubs every hair on my very hairy head the wrong way, which gave me some bad hair days, poor me.

And then it got worse. We had some joker called Steve Davidson, whose total contribution to sf seems to have been purchasing the IP address for ‘Amazing Stories’ and then emptying his bowels onto it, issuing threats and ultimatum to authors that if they didn’t renounce SP3 they’d be vewwy vewwy sorry.

At which point I was furious that I couldn’t tell Steve Davidson to shove his head where the sun don’t shine* and to take the Hempress of Colney ‘atch with him and a bucket of abrasive to make a joyous trip for all of them. Because I’m screwed if I take orders from either of them or their little friends. And if I can deal with sticking my hand down a hole that could have a deadly snake in it, I’d cope with the risks of a mere bunch of Traditional Publishing Establishment vipers.

And then, of course came two surprises with the announcement of Hugo Award Shortlist of Nominees.

The first and important one.
1) HOW DID THEY KNOW?
2) What the hell was my name doing there?

Let’s just think about that first one. How did TNH know it was Sad Puppies getting so many Noms…in advance? Let alone Steve Davidson, whoever he is. Had someone on the Hugo committee leaked this information? That would be seriously unethical. Damningly so, deserving of expulsion from the organization, and public shaming and an apology. So just how else DID they know? How would you know, beforehand, just what is going on?

Let’s apply Occam’s razor. The matter needs a shave…

There are only two possibilities. A) Someone in the Hugos committee leaked. B) They knew, somehow, perhaps by telepathy or arcane magic if not by the collusion they deny, that various people they expected to be there, hadn’t got a call/e-mail letting them know they’d been shortlisted on the final nominations.

Now, keep in mind that’s a LOT of possible Nominations to contact/be contacted you and say “I didn’t get a call”, so short of telepathy or magic… the only way you could contact the possible nominations you expected, would be to know who hell they were. And the only way you could know that was if a fairly large number of you had agreed to nominate such-and-such.

So I guess there is the smoking gun. We know, besides the numbers Vox Day provides here and here, just which group must have been block voting. That they did so all without organizing and communicating in private is of course possible. Just very, very unlikely. Of course, if they’re innocent, they can tell us who on the Hugo Committee told them.

Of then we come the point 2. The first I knew of it was people congratulating me. I eventually sent an e-mail to the Sasquan Hugo organizers who loftily informed me that the contact form on my web-page ‘was the only address/method that we could find.’ (Look. It is not even in the spam box. Slip ups happen.) Which has to make you laugh, as I have two publishers they could have contacted, I’m on facebook, Linkedin, Twitter, and you know, there is this site we – Cedar, Amanda, and myself are up for the award for writing on, let alone asking Cedar or Amanda for my address or to get me to contact them. Oh and there are runners with cleft sticks. Look. It’s not important. Like Larry, I’ve been accused of ‘wanting a Hugo’. If I’d known in advance – prior to the attempts to bully the SP3 nominees… I’d have stepped down. Now I can’t, because I don’t give way to this sort of behavior. So if you just missed nomination – you know who thank for not getting in.

We have to stand up to them. SF needs to break this culture of bullying, of overt abuse of power. We need SF to go back to being what people read because they love reading it, not because some bunch of self-elected ‘elite’ says it will be good for them. Stuff them. They couldn’t put their arms down a muttonbird hole to save their lives.

Not that I want it. Which is why right now I am going to encourage you to vote for Cedar or Amanda. We need more Mormon men winning the Hugo. They deserve it more than me anyway. But do apply the fact that messages don’t get through to question 1.

I am, however, just wanting all of you, Moshe Feder, Patrick Neilsen Hayden, – (as present Tor editors –is this company policy or your private initiative?) issuing threats and abuse (HOW DID YOU KNOW?) and TNH who issued this charming little threat: “Which is to say, it violates a lot of people’s sense of how one ought to behave, and if you do it you’ll incur widespread disapproval. Prepare to deal.” (Who will rid you of these tempestuous priests, your Hempressness?)

To all of you, to Steve Davidson, and all of your camp followers…

Bring it on.

BRING IT ON.

BRING. IT. ON.

Let’s see. You’re not going to buy my books? Gee that should make… zero difference to my bottom line.

You’re going to tell your friends not buy my books? You mean you have friends? – I mean outside your circle-jerk who would rather die than buy them anyway?

You’re going to give me no reviews? What a change.

You’re going to badmouth and lie me as often as possible and at your usual Requires Hate level vile? Children, I grew up in a commercial fishing harbor. I was an Army NCO. You make me laugh. And besides the fact bad publicity is still more than anyone but your clique of little pets got, what else is new?

You’re going to never publish me? Gee, you never did, and never would have, because I’m not one of your kiss-up sycophants.

You’re going to shun me? Never invite me to your conferences? Oh be still my beating heart. Never to see WisCon…

I’m quivering in my boots. Mind you it could be because I got wet bringing the boat in and I went straight to write this and I’m bloody cold by now. Maybe you’d like to wish me the sniffles? That might work!

And now let’s talk about something you jackasses might need to “prepare to deal”.

You’re a tiny, unpleasant, arrogant echo-chamber of elitist losers who have almost no contact with the real world. That’s the real world that actually buys most books.

If we start to respond in kind… we still do buy the loud anti-puppies authors. We buy books published by Tor. We haven’t… yet, resorted to your petulant nonsense. And you can’t survive it, if it happens. In truth your little inner circle is tiny. Look at the demographics of the country. A huge proportion of the audience you sell to have reason, good reason, to say “Why the hell should I buy a book from someone who plainly despises me, despises my views, my culture, and increasingly offers me a lecture on how bad I am instead of a good story. There are other books.”

And that is something you’re not prepared to deal with.

It’s _our_ community you need to fit into. Our traditions and culture you need to show some respect for. You’re the ones who need to learn to stick your hands down a burrow to be accepted.

We don’t actually have to listen and obey.

And I for one, am not going to.

*Slice. Where the monkey keeps his nuts. As a monkey I should know

95 responses to “BRING IT ON”

  1. A shock to Sanford? Imagine my consternation, after having given birth to four children, and nursing them, to discover I’m really a male! Birdin’ sounds really unpleasant, by the way, but someday I’d love to come along, even if all I do is clean. I can gut a bird purty quick n’ clean.

    1. Huh. Cedar,you’d be in there with the rest of us. Actually, that goes for all the MGC ladies. You’ll all do to ride the river with. Isn’t funny? The ones squalling they’re victims… wouldn’t do it.

      Birdin’ is strange. I come a little closer to understanding how the Japanese love Fugu. And yet… there is something instinctive and enormously satisfying about the hunting. Humans did this before they were human. Some of us like me haven’t passed that by much.

      1. I have always found deep satisfaction in preparing a meal that I’d grown/caught/butchered myself. Maybe it’s because that’s how I was raised. I know that this summer I don’t plan to have a garden for the first time in… ever. It feels wrong, but I also know I won’t have time for it. And I can promise myself that I WILL have one again soon. Because it does satisfy something in the soul. I won’t hunt or fish again for years, just too many people in my neck of the woods for now.

  2. Well, after all the competition ASSUMES abnormal relations are the norm.

    So, if Cedar claims she’s a transgendered gay man, and that Sanford is a transgendered lesbian. . . . she’s In Like Flint. . . . (evil grin)

    1. Has Flint ever been nominated for a Hugo?

      1. No he hasn’t. Eric has a couple of problems with his resume. First he is an avowed Trotskyist but he also writes for the dreaded right-wing Baen publishing company. He also doesn’t write his message into his novels enough to make some people happy. All he does write is good books.

        1. He should have been there.

          1. I love 1632 but Mother of Demons blew me away.

      2. Probably not — and he started the gigantic Grantville series, which was the biggest and most successful lost-in-time series, surpassing even S. M. Stirling’s Island in the Sea of Time trilogy. Which I don’t think won the awards, either, even though it revived a whole sub-genre.

    2. Hmm. you have a point. According to them: Sex is a social construct you choose, genitals and chromosomes are irrelevant. So yes, I’m a transgendered lesbian, just like Sanford. So how do we get the ‘Mormon’ part right?

      1. I hear it involves green jello. We really, really don’t want to go there.

        1. Oh, no! Not the dreaded “carrots & raisins” vs “pineapple & fruit cocktail” quarrel! Just walk away, man, just walk away! 😛

          1. What? I never knew Mormons were Lutheran.!

            1. Funeral Potatoes.
              No, I am not LDS. I do live in Mormonville, Idaho. While they do jello salad just as well as Lutherans, the really amazing food that Mormons make is Funeral Potatoes. The key ingredients are potatoes, of course, heavy whipping cream, and cheese. Other than that, there are as many recipes as there are Mormon ladies. Some substitute cream soups for the heavy whipping cream, but I am persuaded that they are heretics. Ham or bacon make a nice addition, and I’ve even had excellent Funeral Potatoes that included vegetables such as celery. Corn flakes and potato chips are often used as toppings.
              Funeral Potatoes are apparently so-named because they are traditionally served at funeral potlucks, not because they could be heart-attack inducing. Look them up: there are competitions for the best, and recipes available online.

              1. I returned home after years in California and then a couple overseas and they had a potluck with those potatoes. I think all the church ladies thought I was crazy because they were soooooooooo good and I ooooed and awwwwed and yummmmed and had thirds. In California we had hotdogs at church. Eeeewwww.

  3. Heck, I just hope to improve my writing to the point where I have something worthy of being nominated for a Hugo. D*mn the photon torpedoes and warp speed ahead!

    Birdin’ sounds a bit like noodlin’ for catfish, back in the days of 70-90 pound channel cat in Midwestern rivers. Except instead of snakebite, it was wounds going septic (and drowning) that could kill ‘ya. And it sounds like you keep more clothes on for birdin’ than for noodlin’.

    1. “Birdin’ sounds a bit like noodlin’ for catfish,”

      My first thoughts also, and no I’ve never noodled, but always wanted to try it.

      1. Noodling is useful. It helps to pasta the time.

        1. *offers Bearcat and Dave the carp-buchet lanyard*

    2. The basic premise of noodling is you’re in water the consistency of thin soup only not as clear, work you way along the bank reaching into every hole and crevice where one of the monster catfish might be tucked into. When you find one youreach in and force your hand and arm into their mouth, then grab them by the throat from the inside out. It’s at this point that the fun starts as you determine just who caught who.
      Last I knew the record blue catfish taken from the Mississippi river on the Illinois Iowa border weighed 124 pounds and was 58 inches long. Biggest channel cat only came in at 58 pounds, practically a minnow in comparison.
      I grew up in those parts right along the river. Never noodled, always used hook and line so still have all my fingers and mostly free of scars on my forearms.

      1. My father-in-law noodled catfish. He was also on a recovery team and had to drag the river many times. One day he stopped noodling. I suspect it had to do with the latter, but he never said.

        Since my family came out of the hills, noodling wasn’t our thing. Having an uncle almost die from a cottonmouth bite also took the sheen off of it. Oddly, gators didn’t figure into the equation, though historically they would hunt along the edge of the rivers.

    3. Grin. I do keep my clothes on. You just end up smelling like you shouldn’t have.

  4. I have to say that desciption hits most of my primal fears. Also, infrared cameras needed, even if that is cheating.

    I seem to recall there have been other cases of Hugo nominees not being notified, but very few. Usually it is taken as a challenge, to hunt people up.

    1. Yeah. I guess it depends on how badly they want to. Says something, doesn’t it?

      My Barbs has tried… she just can’t put her hand into the hole. It takes a blend of fatalism and stupidity. I must have both in sufficient quantities.

      1. Reality Observer Avatar
        Reality Observer

        Or youthful disbelief in mortality (and stupidity). Spent one week as an assistant on a desert rodent population survey – and then humbled myself and got my old job back squeegeeing dog poop around my Dad’s boarding kennels…

        I’ve seen noodling (IIRC, it was on one of those “River Monsters” shows). Thanks – no thanks. I’ll stick to trudging around the foothills with my spear, hunting javelina boar. MUCH safer.

  5. Dang, you really been a workin’ hard at that oppressin’ thing, by the looks a yer hands.

    1. It’s reaching for the sushi on the naked woman on the conveyor belt. Hell on your hands. That and using the silver caviar shovel.

  6. “Ask Mike Glyer for your personal inquisition”

    ROFLMAO.

    1. I keep getting tagged on these threads where people are passing each other file 770 as “all you need to know about the Hugos.”
      That’s how I found out I’m a Mormon male and white, too.
      Mormonism must be true because it performs miracles, considering I gave birth to the two boys of largitude and swarthitude.

      1. questionableprovenance Avatar
        questionableprovenance

        Damn, Madam! You are a wordsmith of exquisite creativity. “Largitude” and “swarthitude” are hereby tucked into my little pocket of stolen brilliancies.

      2. Always did think myself that you were a Saint, but not so much by the LDS definition, but more of a female Simon Templar.
        My but this is entertaining. I’ve done more commenting in recent weeks than I’ve written since I quit cranking out gubmint documents.
        Pity though, after laser gum surgery a while back I had to swear off popcorn. Guess pudding will have to suffice.

      3. I’ve got to admit: a man giving birth is an order of magnitude more miraculous than a virgin woman accomplishing the same. At least the virgin woman has all the required organs, while you, Mr. Samuel Hoyt, clearly don’t! 😉

    2. Yeah, if I was to offer any friendly advice to the guy it would simply be “Stop digging, Mike. With your nom track record, you really, really need to stop digging. There’s this credibility thing you may hear about one day. You need to learn to behave like the teacher’s kid.”

  7. BobtheRegisterredFool Avatar
    BobtheRegisterredFool

    For a chunk, I’d misread the ex-Army NCO as referring to Brad. My understanding is that he is a warrant, and still in the Army.

    I think Jeffro Johnson is also notable in the fan writer category. Okay, maybe I’m uncultured not to have read /Journey to the Center of the Earth/ before. I’d picked up Zelazny and others on individual recommendation, but I’ve still found Johnson’s Appendix N survey helpful.

    1. Er. I was referring to Brad. He mentioned it himself the other day. I didn’t realize it was still current.

      1. BobtheRegisterredFool Avatar
        BobtheRegisterredFool

        My understanding is that he is in the National Guard, but I may not be informed correctly.

  8. Thanks Dave, for a very entertaining Monday read. I also really appreciate the thrust of it.

    Instead of spite and fire, you respond with dry humor and steadfastness. Leave the other side make themselves look silly.

    1. Heh. They’re doing such a good job of it, it seems sad to stop them.

  9. SJW’s want to push my friends around? Let’s party.

  10. Damn good post, Dave! Cheers!

  11. Well said sir!
    Gave up hunting myself a while back when it occurred to me that it was way too much like real work. Was resigned to subsisting on store bought meat, but realized that I had this hobby I was quite good at, reloading metallic cartridges. Now I custom reload for several of my younger friends at cost and now and again one stops by with a little something for the freezer. Just last week a buddy dropped off eight pounds of ground Elk, a couple of Elk steaks, and two very nice backstraps of venison.

    1. I’ll give up hunting when I quit enjoying it, or get too feeble, or when venison falls in price to the under $2/lb I spend (processing included!) to fetch my own.

      1. Tully, when I do it, I know how it died, how it was butchered, and what hard it was :-). Important things for a man to know.

    2. Hmm… pity you’re so far off :-). The exchange of gifts of fish and meat and veg here, especially for people who do useful stuff, is remarkable.

  12. They have angered the monkey. Never anger the monkey! He throws coconuts.

    1. Nay good sir, a wise monkey never throws away good food. Instead he politely dines and after an appropriate wait flings what that food ultimately becomes.

  13. Mutton Bird is the very first food my stomach has instantly rejected. Violently. Which tells you just how tough those islanders are.

    1. They either die young, or very old 😉

  14. You don’t take kindly to being given orders? Then let me tell, in no uncertain terms, to STOP WRITING. Especially, stop writing young adult and kid books.

    1. Stop writing mysteries, too, or else! (Or else I’ll buy them, but never mind.)

      1. In my copious spare time… Yes, I will do another. Someday.

        1. By Mother’s Day? By September (Mom’s birthday)? By Christmas? Please?

          1. Holly – saying this seriously (because I usually joke, I like to flag that up) I hate to promise anything I am not certain I can do. 🙂

            1. I hope it was clear I was only teasing. We liked Joy very much. If you can write a sequel, I’d be delighted, and so would Mom.

              I certainly would not want to come off as rude, demanding and entitled. I’m very sorry if I did.

              1. entitled? no, not in the least. 🙂 But deserving a serious and honest answer.

    2. Ah. But I have a conundrum for you. You see I have no problem in taking orders from people I have established I can respect. So what do you want me to do? 😉

      1. I don’t think you’d want me to answer that, the answer would involve a lot less sticking your arm where it might get injected with venom. No offense, but I prefer my authors living. I already lost Terry Pratchett this decade, and that was more than enough.

        You see why I don’t usually tell people what to do? It’s a lot easier to respect me when I act like I don’t know what is best for people who know their own lives a lot better than I do.

        1. Of course NOT telling them what to do is in itself worthy of respect.

  15. Dave, that picture accompanying your comment about your hands was fantastic- I’m a former fisherman myself, and can’t even write longhand anymore after too many breaks and not enough gloves. Current crew of the fellow SF-fans on my boat (an oil tanker) includes a navy medic, a boilermaker, hair colorist (it’s a thing!), plumber, marine biologist and an auto-body tech. Not one respectable WASP’y upbringing on the list.

    1. Paul, I know -usually in the evening – that my hands are hammered. But at least when I die they’ll say ‘He’s lived.’ The idea of pushing sf into an effete academic ghetto pisses me no end. I like my books to be read, and hope you’ve got a few on your oil tanker.

    2. I slowed down the stuff that made me lose feeling in my fingers after I messed up my hands the last time. I’ve a great deal of respect for fishermen, sailors, and folks what do that kind of hard work every day. Hat’s off to ya both, sirs.

      And Dave, since ya asked for votes for Cedar and Amanda, I’ll honor that request. You’re right, they deserve it for enjoyable, good, and honest work. But you earned your nomination, too. It’s been the sort of stuff a fan of science fiction can appreciate.

      Congrats once again to all the Hugo nominees. Y’all did good. Now keep writing! *grin*

  16. Congratulations to the nominated Mad folks here, much deserved!

    I’ve just registered as a supporting member of Sasquan so I can can cast a vote–for the first time. What happens now? I know they send out packet of the nominated works (or extracts). After I’ve read them and made my choices, how are the votes cast? E-form, paper, telegram, or do they count SJW tears?

    Also, is there a button or an arm band that I have to wear as a ‘not real’ fan from now on?

    1. You’ll get a notice on where to download the packet when they have it ready. Save emails with PIN numbers and member numbers in them. You’ll get an e-mail when voting opens, and can then vote online or by paper. Do it online and you can twiddle your ballot until the close of voting.

      If you attend the WorldCon, we will provide you with the button and the armband. Also the Sooper Sekrit recognition rituals. And coupon good for one glass of Mystery Potion. (Informed Consent: Video cameras will be on site.)

      1. Thanks. I’m looking forward to the process.

        While I’ve been a fan since I was old enough to select my own books from the shelves, I’ve never been to a con.

        Have thought about trying to attend one local to me (ApolloCon) to hit the writers workshop, but fear the scene from Carrie if my wrongfan/wrong would-be writer standing was revealed 🙂

        1. Most conventions are still pretty much about the fun. I have had a fair amount of fun at some fairly liberal conventions, although I gotta say that libertarian conventions are more fun.

          The important thing is to wear comfy shoes and comfy pants, because you’ll probably do a fair amount of walking, standing, and sitting. Possibly while carrying loads of goodies from the dealer room, art show, etc.

    2. Ho. You want our sekrit decoder ring? Next thing you’ll want into the tree-house too 🙂 (Tully does a good job answering the questions below)

      1. Last time I joined something, there was marching and uniforms plus I had to sign NDAs for the damn decoder ring.

        The SJWs scare me more than our old Cold War foes so the access code to the tree-house would be greatly appreciated. 😛

    3. I understand Sasquan is hoping to have the Hugo Packet ready by Memorial Day, but these things are always at the mercy of the publishers.

      Some publishers (like Baen) say “no prob!”, and not only OK the nom’s inclusion but often all the books in the series (if there is one) as well. Other publishers (like Orbit) take their time to decide what they want to do, and then only decide to send out “extended excerpts” (like last year). Also, the authors have some say as to whether their work goes into the packet; while most are OK with it, there are some who aren’t.

      At a guess, I’m thinking all of Castalia House’s stuff will be in there. Works that appeared in Analog are also usually no problem. Tor usually includes its entries (but not always, and who knows what they’ll be doing this year in reaction to the Sad Puppies). Don’t know about Ace/Roc or 47North, but probably they’ll be there as well. On the other end of the scale, I’m guessing Orbit will do the same thing they did last year and just include excerpts from Ancillary Sword.

      1. Good info. Thanks.

  17. What I find amazing about the SWJ voting block is how small it is. For several years the TOR editors gotten nominate with under 100 ballots. I think they are shocked that SD and RP have stolen their secret of block voting and done it with larger numbers.

  18. “We were warned that the wrath of the important people in SF.”

    You misspelled ‘Impotent.’ 😉

    1. It’s one of the things I do to amuse people. My spelling has my editor in gales of laughter 😉

  19. Reblogged this on The Arts Mechanical and commented:
    Dave Freer, that truly wonderful guy, doesn’t like bullies either. If you ever get the chance to meet him, be prepared to laugh. His sense of humor is much worse than his bite.

    1. Huh. I haven’t bitten anyone for at least an hour.

      1. Then you haven’t seen the latest on the Sad Puppies. EW put their foot in it, big time. Larry and Brad are REALLY pissed, as in lawyer pissed.

        1. I thought ‘EW’ was an involuntary noise made on smelling a four-day sun matured dead wallaby exploding on you. It seems I was mistaken. Or was I?

          1. No that’s about it, except I would go for eight week dead sperm whale that’s just been popped on this one.

        2. EW posted a correction rather than withdraw it. The Rolling Stone of entertainment reporting.

          1. Some correction, just removing the word “racist.” Unless they’ve changed it again.

          2. Yup, back pedaling, real fast. Now maybe if they had done the right thing in the first place and not run that smear job lying hit piece.

        3. So what is the other definition of EW?

          1. An eight week old sperm whale that’s just been popped.

        4. And the article has been re-written. To bad there are screencaps, copies…. All the evidence a court of law would need. Glorious

  20. For what its worth, Lines of Departure now has its Hugo nom listed on its Amazon page:

  21. Just finished reviewing the first volume in Sabrina Chase’s Sequoyah series “The Long Way Home. ” It’s up on my blog, and will be up on Amazon in a bit.
    I’ve also giggled my way through Kate’s “Knights in Tarnished Armor,” for the fourth time. The first two times, I didn’t realize just how badly I was suffering from sleep deprivation, and I kept finishing scenes in my head, in ways that had NOTHING to do with Kate’s ideas. Fortunately, I realized that before I reviewed ‘Knights in Tarnished Armor: the Cooking Show.” Took me two more read-throughs to get my goofy plots eliminated. The fault lies NOT in Kate’s writing, but in my self-imposed Easter Vigil.

  22. and congratulations to Dave, now that we’ve seen you.

    1. 🙂 Thank you. I really appreciate the gesture. I just feel there are more deserving writers out there.

      1. if you think so, Dave. Some of the stuff i’ve seen you write here had been excellent observations on writing, and other stuff, observations on fandom.

      2. “I just feel that there are more deserving writers out there.”
        If ‘more’ modifies ‘writers,’ this is a true statement. However, if ‘more’ modifies ‘deserving,’ I cannot accept it.
        This is your time, boy. Shine on!
        I keep checking internally to see if it matters who wins, and so far, all I’m getting is ‘Nope.’ The announcement of the final picks is really going to be anti-climactic, I think.

  23. Great post today, sir. Much appreciated.

  24. Okay, you know what? I appreciated that so much that I don’t want to give you a mere “Thank you for writing that.” I want to give you the kind of thank-you that counts: cash.

    Thing is, I don’t know what of yours to buy next. Can you help me out? I really enjoyed both the Rats, Bats & Vats novels, both Dragon’s Ring novels, and the Karres sequels you wrote. Had lots of fun with the Heirs of Alexandria series too, though in a four-author book it’s hard to tell what was yours, but the one I really liked best was the Pyramid Scheme series. (I didn’t much enjoy The Forlorn, but it’s been so long since I read it that I couldn’t tell you at this point why it didn’t “click” for me back then).

    So since I not only want to throw some money your way, but would also like to really enjoy myself in the process, what book of yours should I pick up next? Do you have anything else out in the Pyramid Scheme or Rats, Bats & Vats series?

    1. Robin, that’s a really fine gesture. I am touched by it. No more Pyramid Scheme’s I am afraid. I haven’t really written any long-form humor-adventure since. The Bolg PI stories are a bit heavier on the humor. Stardogs is straight-up space opera. Actually you might enjoy Slow Train to Arcturus, which has both adventure and some humor (although less puns)

      1. I’ve already bought Slow Train to Arcturus since I usually buy all the Baen monthly bundles as they become available, so that won’t work for my current purposes. So I picked up Bolg, PI: The Vampire Bride at Amazon instead. Thanks!

  25. Very well written… Flinders Island sounds like an almost mythical place, wonderful in other words. I have been in the city of Houston for almost 40 years and it is easy to forget how very different rural living really can be. I am envious, guess I ‘ll have to go oppress someone. Thanks for all the well written books!

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